In a little while
One thing I am starting to learn about the world and our/my position in it, is that our lives are influenced by deterministic forces beyond our control. We are shaped, constructed in a society that barely knows us but vies for our control. Our lives are very shallow in this state of affairs.
Television, and now the Internet dictates, while we wait, anticipate. Here, in Vancouver, a staple of this daft determinism are yoga pants. T&A and Lululemon tracksuits, the new prisonwear for daily life. Slap a 9 digit number above your breast and call me Bubba. Lovely.
As these, obviously atheletically inclined, consumers run in the marathon we know as life in a capitalist world, I sink further into my depression; wondering how it would be possible for me to be part of this world without being, at least slightly, depressed.
The solution, although bleak, is to seek and realize our capability for agency. To see past the sexual overtones, undertones, midtones, the phoney lives on tv, the phoney lives replicated from tv ( oh baudrillard! ). What do we do when the map envelopes the reality? Resist through pockets of space where we can find agency ( Foucault, tell me more! ). Yeah, I know, vague notions of salvation of reality, but there is possibly power in the vague. In fact, it might be the critical factor in salvation.
I know now that I cannot stay in one place for longer than 8 months. In fact, I don't believe I have since I left home. So 5 years, of displacement in country to which I was a stranger. I digress. .. which is to be expected.
But I think it is a necessary to always be on the move. I move a little, drop off the material possessions and baggage that I have collected on the way, find a new spot, and then repeat. It's not a perfect solution, or maybe not even a solution at all, but it is a path. But I'm still waiting, to break on through.
A few more months, a little more work, a lot more procrastination, and I'll be heading to Japan; a much needed move. I feel the need to disappear once again (hm.. this drifter paradigm of mine might be a clue to my inability to maintain relationships, but it's time for me to stop thinking).
Television, and now the Internet dictates, while we wait, anticipate. Here, in Vancouver, a staple of this daft determinism are yoga pants. T&A and Lululemon tracksuits, the new prisonwear for daily life. Slap a 9 digit number above your breast and call me Bubba. Lovely.
As these, obviously atheletically inclined, consumers run in the marathon we know as life in a capitalist world, I sink further into my depression; wondering how it would be possible for me to be part of this world without being, at least slightly, depressed.
The solution, although bleak, is to seek and realize our capability for agency. To see past the sexual overtones, undertones, midtones, the phoney lives on tv, the phoney lives replicated from tv ( oh baudrillard! ). What do we do when the map envelopes the reality? Resist through pockets of space where we can find agency ( Foucault, tell me more! ). Yeah, I know, vague notions of salvation of reality, but there is possibly power in the vague. In fact, it might be the critical factor in salvation.
I know now that I cannot stay in one place for longer than 8 months. In fact, I don't believe I have since I left home. So 5 years, of displacement in country to which I was a stranger. I digress. .. which is to be expected.
But I think it is a necessary to always be on the move. I move a little, drop off the material possessions and baggage that I have collected on the way, find a new spot, and then repeat. It's not a perfect solution, or maybe not even a solution at all, but it is a path. But I'm still waiting, to break on through.
A few more months, a little more work, a lot more procrastination, and I'll be heading to Japan; a much needed move. I feel the need to disappear once again (hm.. this drifter paradigm of mine might be a clue to my inability to maintain relationships, but it's time for me to stop thinking).
